disconnected

[denelian]

sometimes i think i am dying. that im gonna go to sleep and never wake up. i'm terrified and full of guilt everytime i feel this way. not suicide, i just...won't... wake.
i'm terrified that it will happen, and that pete will freak, thinking he didn't show me enough love; that luny will freak, because she's cut me out; that phoenix will freak cuz she's 11...

why do i keep think i am going to die? its not every night, or even all the time. but its really bad right now. its choking me, pretty literally

can i blame my meds?

Comments

[sadslacker.livejournal.com]

Or perhaps the dark clothed man in the wide brimmed hat that follows you everywhere you go! >:)

[denelian.livejournal.com]

i KNEW it was you stalking me!

come in for a drink next time *G*

actually, it would be nice to see you again - you always cheer my up :)

[anivair.livejournal.com]

I suspect you can blame the meds.

You should also blame them on the fact that you seemingly never look to either side w hile driving, because I drive next to you for five minutes on Monday and you were pretty oblivious. It was amusing.

[denelian.livejournal.com]

when and where was this???
although yeay, monday sucked...

[anivair.livejournal.com]

umm . . . driving down 71 on monday. 6:30 ish. I was on my way to class.

[denelian.livejournal.com]

erm...

wasn't me. i got out of class VERY early on monday - around 5:20, and went south. i live in grove city now.

pretty sure anyway... well, i ran by Pete's, but that was for like 2 minutes...

[anivair.livejournal.com]

You're hard to mistake for anyone else. promise. I might be wrong about the time, but not who it was.

[denelian.livejournal.com]

really? i'm gonna claim that as a compliment ;)

i admit that my meds make really really freaking focused. i hate driving - i'm on OPIATES, for godssake, and while i have been told and told im fine driving, it scares me.

so, uh, "HI JOE!" and a wave :)

[anivair.livejournal.com]

Excellent!

[denelian.livejournal.com]

:)

we really should hang out again sometime - i miss talking with you

[sadslacker.livejournal.com]

This has occured between us before as well. Normally on the 670 interchange between Summit and the 71 N/S split, it's happened three times too. I just forget to mention it.

[opalinemortal.livejournal.com]

http://www.drugdigest.org/DD/Home/AllAboutDrugs/0,4081,,00.html

Its one of my favorite resources when I don't have my PDR handy. You can look up just about every drug that's ever been created and check their side effects (listed by always report to your doctor, does not require medical attention but report if they are are often and bothersome, etc).
Remember, you can also talk to your pharmacist too. They are required by law to provide "counciling" (which means answer your questions about drugs and advise you on if you should talk to your doctor if you are concerned - a bit more than that, but that's all that patients usually ask) to their patients. The pharmacist is a good start because they're often more familiar with the side effects and have a better grasp on drug interactions with other medicines you are taking (via prescription or OTC).

Any which way you look at it, drugs, stress, or whatever, I really hope that you feel better - and soon!

[denelian.livejournal.com]

i always call my mom - a nurse practicion; evetyone family needs one.

the problem is, im on OPIATES - this is a common side effect, and nothing to do to fix it, just wait it out. which i do. it was just really bad last night.

thanx for the help, though. the thought is VERY appreciated, not to mention i miss seeing you :)

[christraven.livejournal.com]

Oh, give it a rest, Sylvia Plath.

:P

Nah, I'm sorry you feel this way, and I'd have to guess it's definitely the meds. The pharmas are like Homer Simpson's view on beer: "The cause of, and cure for, all of man's problems."

I hope you feel better soon, baby.

[denelian.livejournal.com]

SYLVIA PLATH?!?

wow, remind me to never cry at you in real life *G*

although, better Plath than Simpson. lol!!!

thanx for the well wishes...

[roniliquidity.livejournal.com]

I dunno. Sometimes I become convinced TONIGHT is the night a serial killer will sneak into the apartment. I recognize it's ridiculous but I sleep with one eye open. It may be your meds, it also may be that we, as people can convince ourselves of ridiculous stuff in the middle of the night.