the thing is, you are - right there, in that reply - denying any agency to a lot of people. what you are not wanting to see is that it takes ALL of these people to make, and reinforce, these impossible beauty standards. following a societal norm means that you are REINFORCING it, whether or not you think you can control it. gay men are NOT the ones who decide what is attractive, they merely decide who they are going to use as models. the people who decide what is considered attractive are all of the people whose opinion is sought by the masses - George Clooney or Brad Pitt or Barack Obama... does this make sense to you, as in do you understand what i am saying? when famous and popular guys decide to reinforce societal norms (and to be honest, when they have a hand in CREATING those norms, by pretty much only dating a certain type of women), that is when we start to see unrealistic beauty standards. when one MUST look AT A MINIMUM as beautiful as Angelina or Kate Moss, IN THE SAME TYPE OF BEAUTY, because variations are rejected, in order to be considered successful... that's where it starts. and then it ripples out for 3 or 4 decades, into what we have now. when it started, when these societal norms were just starting, gay men DID NOT control any industry, MEN did. MEN still do... gay men only really contribute in ONE area, they rest is run either by men or by women who do their best to act as they think men would act. i am not trying to tar ALL men with that brush, btw. there is a distinct difference between "MEN!" and "male people". the first is a CLASS of people, defined not just by their gender but also by how they use that gender to creat themselves more power.
you, on the other hand, are generally a GUY and so when i scream MEN! i am NOT screaming at or about you.
all that said... i am sorry, i didn't know that. i've never said that girls were not as cruel, and you obviously knew some VERY cruel girls.
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the thing is, you are - right there, in that reply - denying any agency to a lot of people. what you are not wanting to see is that it takes ALL of these people to make, and reinforce, these impossible beauty standards.
following a societal norm means that you are REINFORCING it, whether or not you think you can control it. gay men are NOT the ones who decide what is attractive, they merely decide who they are going to use as models. the people who decide what is considered attractive are all of the people whose opinion is sought by the masses - George Clooney or Brad Pitt or Barack Obama... does this make sense to you, as in do you understand what i am saying? when famous and popular guys decide to reinforce societal norms (and to be honest, when they have a hand in CREATING those norms, by pretty much only dating a certain type of women), that is when we start to see unrealistic beauty standards. when one MUST look AT A MINIMUM as beautiful as Angelina or Kate Moss, IN THE SAME TYPE OF BEAUTY, because variations are rejected, in order to be considered successful... that's where it starts. and then it ripples out for 3 or 4 decades, into what we have now. when it started, when these societal norms were just starting, gay men DID NOT control any industry, MEN did. MEN still do... gay men only really contribute in ONE area, they rest is run either by men or by women who do their best to act as they think men would act.
i am not trying to tar ALL men with that brush, btw. there is a distinct difference between "MEN!" and "male people". the first is a CLASS of people, defined not just by their gender but also by how they use that gender to creat themselves more power.
you, on the other hand, are generally a GUY and so when i scream MEN! i am NOT screaming at or about you.
all that said... i am sorry, i didn't know that. i've never said that girls were not as cruel, and you obviously knew some VERY cruel girls.